TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: 'K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
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TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Sarah, give me a sentence starting with 'I.'
Sarah: I is . . .
TEACHER: No, Sarah . . .. Always say, 'I am.'
Sarah: All right . . . 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
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TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No, sir. It's the same dog.
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
Eh Eh Eh funny
ReplyDeleteCheck my blog I have an award for you
hahahahaha!!! these are the same wise-ass replies my nephew Deus would give out! goodness!!! it's like reading that kid's words in english. the jokes cracked me up.
ReplyDeleteSo funny.
ReplyDeleteI am teacher that talk non stop.
My students called me a "machine gun"
my daughter sent these to me… i had to laugh as well… i taught at the college level for seven years, and while my students probably thought they were smarter than the little ones, i would have to say that they are mistaken.
ReplyDeleteand some of my students had a nickname for me as well… "Quark Nazi"… i taught them how to design and use the page layout program… the ones who listened and did what i told them knew that program better than most professionals by the time the class was over!